Letters to Mayor Bloomberg
(In chronological order, beginning with left column)

Dear Chris Orcutt:

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For future reference, your NYC.gov Correspondence Number is 1-3771709.

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Thank you.


Sincerely,


The City of New York


The information you have provided is as follows:
Form: Message to the Mayor
Topic: OTHER
Name: Mr. Chris Orcutt
Street Address: 472 Gramatan Ave., Apt. 3E
City, State Zip: Mount Vernon, NY 10552
Country:
Email: corcutt007@hotmail.com
Company:
Work Phone:
Message:
Dear Mr. Mayor:

As commuters, I and other non-NYC residents already contribute a great deal of revenue to Metropolis (both directly and indirectly)—in sales taxes; monies spent in restaurants, stores, theaters, and with city vendors; tolls, train fares, and parking expenses; entrance fees for museums, historical sites, and other cultural attractions; plus our state income taxes, which subsidize city schools.

Commuters are not able to enjoy the city and its services as much as you argue we do.  The true Commuter Tax is forgoing sleep and time with our families to leave for work earlier and return home considerably later.

Whether we come by train, car, bus or ferry, commuters are the lifeblood of the city.  To reinstate the Commuter Tax is tantamount to taxation without representation, for who represents the interests of commuters in city government?  Answer: no one.

I propose a compromise: put the old commuter tax back into place.  This is a reasonable percentage that will give the city the increased revenue it needs without strapping commuters.

If you would like, I am willing to debate you, on public television, on this issue.  Perhaps we could get that old guy on Channel 4 to have us on his show.

I realize your schedule is pretty full most of the time, however Tuesdays and Thursdays would work best for me because that's when I commute into the City (I teach part-time at Baruch College).

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Chris Orcutt
 

____________________________


Dear Chris Orcutt:

Thank you for using NYC.gov to submit your message.  Your message has been forwarded to the appropriate Agency for review and handling.

For future reference, your NYC.gov Correspondence Number is 1-3771919.

This is an auto-generated system message.  Please do not reply to this message.  Messages received through this address are not processed.

Please send any additional correspondence via NYC.gov at www.nyc.gov.

Thank you.


Sincerely,


The City of New York


The information you have provided is as follows:
Form: Message to the Mayor
Topic: OTHER
Name:  Chris Orcutt
Street Address: 472 Gramatan Ave., Apt. 3E
City, State Zip: Mount Vernon, NY 10552
Country: United States
Email: corcutt007@hotmail.com
Company:
Work Phone: (914) 663-0237
Message:
Dear Mayor Bloomberg:

Hi there.  It's me, Chris Orcutt.  Once again I'm writing you about the proposed Commuter Tax.

I've given this tax quite a bit of thought, and I don't like it.  The way you currently have it set up, if I made $100,000 (I used to make more than this, but alas no longer--I quit my job last December to do this sort of thing: annoy public officals), I'd have to give the city over $3,600!  Since this is chicken-change to someone as rich as you, let me describe how this would affect my life or the lives of my fellow commuters:

1. First, let's get the numbers down: $3,600 works out to $300/month, or $69.23/week, or $9.86/day.

2. If this tax goes into effect, I and other commuters will have to give up something to cover it.  In my case, I will not be able to afford an apartment.  I will be homeless in Westchester County, which, if you know the state of public transportation here, is a scary thought.

3. I and other commuters have gambling debts.  My vig to Jimmy the Zipperhead just happens to be $9.86 per day.  I don't need to tell you what will happen to me if I can't pay.

4. Sometimes I buy boxes of donuts (assorted) for my classes.  Two boxes costs just under $10.00.  If you insist on the Commuter Tax, my hard-working students can kiss goodbye to their treat.

Anyway, please consider my argument.  And by the way, I'm still open to that public debate.

Sincerely,

Chris


_______________________

Dear Chris Orcutt:

Thank you for using NYC.gov to submit your message.  Your message has been forwarded to the appropriate Agency for review and handling.

For future reference, your NYC.gov Correspondence Number is 1-3771795.

This is an auto-generated system message.  Please do not reply to this message.  Messages received through this address are not processed.

Please send any additional correspondence via NYC.gov at www.nyc.gov.

Thank you.


Sincerely,


The City of New York


The information you have provided is as follows:
Form: Message to the Mayor
Topic: OTHER
Name: Mr. Chris Orcutt
Street Address: 472 Gramatan Ave., Apt. 3E
City, State Zip: Mount Vernon, NY 10552
Country: United States
Email: corcutt007@hotmail.com
Company:
Work Phone: (914) 663-0237
Message:
Dear Mike:

An hour has passed, and I haven't heard anything from you or your team since I first proposed the debate. Maybe you don't think I'm serious.  Well, to prove that I am, let's discuss the format:

1. We need moderators. Allow me to suggest Gabe Pressman from WNBC-4, Tim Russert, Woody Allen, and Johnny Knoxville (the guy from "Jackass").

2. Let's have a prepared question format.  Since I'm not an experienced debater, I'd be more comfortable if I could get the questions ahead of time and prepare my answers.  Although I did win a plaque for 4th Place in the Persuasion category of an inter-collegiate forensic competition, I know that this is the big leagues and I'll need extra time.

3. Let's be sitting down instead of standing.  As a commuter, I often have to stand on the train, so my legs are usually tired.  Besides, a sitting debate seems friendlier.

4. As for beverages during the debate, I insist on Nantucket Nectars.  Their cranberry cocktail is lightly refreshing and much tastier than plain water.  Regarding food, I recommend Pret a Manger, the sandwich place.  They have an excellent "Super Club" that I think you will agree lends itself to the debating of serious issues.

5. This should be a marathon debate, not unlike the Muscular Dystrophy thing that Jerry Lewis does on Labor Day.  We debate all day and into the night.  Toward the end, we bring out jugglers, sword-swallowers, and contortionists.  Maybe you and I could do a tap dance routine and...
 

Dear Chris Orcutt:

Thank you for using NYC.gov to submit your message.  Your message has been forwarded to the appropriate Agency for review and handling.

For future reference, your NYC.gov Correspondence Number is 1-3772117.

This is an auto-generated system message.  Please do not reply to this message.  Messages received through this address are not processed.

Please send any additional correspondence via NYC.gov at www.nyc.gov.

Thank you.


Sincerely,


The City of New York


The information you have provided is as follows:
Form: Message to the Mayor
Topic: OTHER
Name: Mr. Chris Orcutt
Street Address: 472 Gramatan Ave., Apt. 3E
City, State Zip: Mount Vernon, NY 10552
Country: United States
Email: corcutt007@hotmail.com
Company:
Work Phone: (914) 663-0237
Message:
Dear Mike:

Hi, it's me again.  Still no word from you about the debate.  That's okay--I realize you're busy.

I've been thinking some more about this commuter tax, and I still don't like it.  Please hear me out.

You see, my friend Lou and I have Sugar Mamas who work in the city and make the big bucks.  While Lou and I make pretty good money, our ladies haul in the dough.

The problem is, a Commuter Tax would cut into our lifestyles--big time.  Lou would have to sell his cigarette boat, and me?--well, I'd have to forgo big purchases from Amazon and imported beers like Bass Ale.  I'd have to start drinking domestics again, Mike, and let me tell you, it's not a pleasant prospect.

How about this for a compromise: in families where both members of the couple work in the city and the woman earns more, you only tax the men.  This way, guys like me who have become accustomed to a certain lifestyle don't have to make big sacrifices.  I think this is a fair idea.

Get back to me.

Sincerely,

Chris

P.S.: If you get a chance, could you bring back a seashell from the Carribbean for me?  One of those conch shells would be great.


_________________________


Dear Chris Orcutt:

Thank you for using NYC.gov to submit your message.  Your message has been forwarded to the appropriate Agency for review and handling.

For future reference, your NYC.gov Correspondence Number is 1-3771973.

This is an auto-generated system message.  Please do not reply to this message.  Messages received through this address are not processed.

Please send any additional correspondence via NYC.gov at www.nyc.gov.

Thank you.


Sincerely,


The City of New York


The information you have provided is as follows:
Form: Message to the Mayor
Topic: OTHER
Name: Mr. Chris Orcutt
Street Address: 472 Gramatan Ave., Apt. 3E
City, State Zip: Mount Vernon, NY 10552
Country: United States
Email: corcutt007@hotmail.com
Company:
Work Phone: (914) 663-0237
Message:
Dear Mike:

I'm currently in a manic phase, so I can't sleep.  Been having a lot of thoughts about this Commuter Tax.  Think I've got alternatives you'll like.  Here goes:

1. Sidewalk tolls.  Instead of raising subway fares or hammering Commuters with a nasty tax, start charging anyone who uses city sidewalks a toll.  Put up turnstiles at every corner and charge a penny a block.  You walk 30 blocks, you pay 30 cents.  It's brilliant, right?  Creates a use for pennies again, and it cuts down on jaywalking.

2. Charge people for breathing city air.  Millions of people suck in life-sustaining oxygen every day and don't have to pay for it.  This is a huge untapped revenue source.  To make it work, everyone in the city (commuters, residents, cops, and yes, even governmental personnel) must breath through hoses with meters strapped to their backs (not unlike water or electric meters).  While doing his business each day, a person would walk past invisible detectors imbedded in lampposts that would read how much air he has consumed that day and bill his credit card.  Of course, if the Olympics come to the city down the road, we'd suspend this law--processing would become too complicated.

3. Tourist tax.  If a person wants to come to New York to spend money and take pictures, she should have to pay for that privilege.  No exceptions.

4. A REALLY BIG pancake breakfast.  You know, like the firehouses used to do.  I have an excellent recipe that I'd be willing to donate t...